5 ways to instantly manifest the confidence to back yourself

When you want to step up in career, leadership and life, you’ve got to put yourself out there and be willing to face rejection. This is never truer than when you’re asking for a pay rise, where quite literally the act of asking is linked to your own economic worth in real terms and to your self-worth, rightly or wrongly, in symbolic terms.

The way you feel going into the conversation (or writing the email or message!) conveys the energy of whether or not you believe in yourself and what you’re asking for. Low, nervous or negative energy flows through despite the words you use. High, confident and positive energy creates a buzz and electricity in the air. They say that emotion is “e-nergy in motion” and when we think that our whole world is made up of energy, we realise that to change our energy, we need to change the way we feel. And usually, that’s to a state of confidence. When we shift our internal energy, our external world changes too, as does our perception of it. 

So when you need confidence and need it quickly, here’s 5 ways to instantly manifest it in a moment:

1. Reflect on achievements, awards and amazing results:

Keep a list of your achievements (hint: your CV is a great place to have these stored under the heading “Achievements” - check out my blog post on “The 4 Most Common CV Mistakes I See”). Keep an email folder of great feedback from leaders and stakeholders and colleagues. Take awards and trophies out from their dusty storage boxes and put them proudly on display, even just for a day. Run through a movie reel in your mind of highlights from your life when you absolutely nailed it and rocked the kasbah. As an NLP Practitioner, I know that our minds literally can’t tell the difference between something real and vividly imagined so the simple act of reflecting can turn your low energy to vibrant in a matter of minutes.

2. Compare yourself to your past you:

Think about yourself 7 years ago and think about all you’ve done, learned and loved in that time. Imagine how that past you would marvel at who you are today, and look up to your current self, asking for advice and belief that the future is bright. 

3. Prime yourself with pumped up music and power poses:

If you’re in my Leading Successful Change program, the bonus module called “Presenting like a Pro” features a ton of great ideas to handle the nerves before an evaluative situation such as presenting, going for an interview, or asking for a pay rise. A key one is priming yourself (which means getting yourself into the state you want to be in), which can be done instantly by listening to a pumped up high-energy music track (I actually keep a Spotify playlist for this purpose!) and partnering it with a power pose that allows you to expand and open your body physically, which lifts and lights your body energetically.

4. Make easier asks:

When you want to get over the fear of rejection, practice makes perfect! By making small asks through your day, such as asking the barista to make your takeaway coffee warm so you can drink it straight away (which I do all the time!), you start to take the negative charge and fear away from asking for what you want and deserve. This is especially true of a product or service where you are the customer or client. You don’t need to be rude about it, but you can always ask the question in line with your preferences or expectations and build that muscle of belief that your experience matters.

5. Surround yourself with others who are kicking the goals you want!

One of the things I love most about our LSC community is how LSC students come back and share the successes they’ve had with pay rises, promotions and career changes because it helps others believe it is possible to. We need to see success to believe success and when you see regular every day women doubling and tripling their salary or getting several pay rises in a year, you start to realise that it can be the norm if you’re hanging out with the right people. Whether that’s in LSC or any other group or forum with ambitious, positive, passionate women kicking goals, immerse yourself in what’s possible.

These 5 suggestions seem pretty simple, but don’t let that fool you: they are powerful practices in converting your energy and sense of self-worth instantly so you can back yourself to have the conversations you need with aligned and inherent confidence.

If you’re ready to step up into your leadership and your light and open yourself up to the possibilities of your future, come join Leading Successful Change. Our next monthly group Coaching Call is Wednesday 1 February and we’ll be busting beliefs around pay rises, promotions and career changes to pave the way for your success in 2023.

Interested? Join here, or shoot me a DM on LinkedIn and I can answer any questions you have about the program.

Lata xx

P.S. Seriously, if you're considering joining Leading Successful Change, ask me any questions you have via DM on LinkedIn. It can be any question on course content, bonuses, lifetime access, the monthly coaching calls, or the 24/7 online community - or anything else that springs to mind. Just be sure to do it ASAP ahead of our monthly coaching call next week! :)